"Maybe I know, somewhere deep in my soul, that love never lasts and we've got to find other ways to make it alone, or keep a straight face. And I've always lived like this-keeping a comfortable distance and up until now I had sworn to myself that I was content with lonliness. Cause none of it was ever worth the risk, but...you are the only exception" -Paramore
I've always had the silent unspoken rule for myself that I need to be comfortable with myself and love who I am before I can allow someone else to love me. I believe that is the only way someone can give you their everything and you can allow yourself to give them your everything. I've always wondered if I would ever find someone who would finish my puzzle, who would fit perfectly with me. I am a big jumble of ideas, opinions, feelings, thoughts, and emotions that never makes sense. I am a foreign language, and I need a translator. I need someone to figure me out. I want someone to figure me out. I want someone to love me for all my flaws. I want someone to be able to finish my sentences and understand where I am coming from and know what I am going to say before I say it.
I feel like no one will ever understand though, because at times I don't even understand me. But for now I am completely content with who I am. I am not "single" because that implies that I am looking for something, and I'm not. I'm happy being a foreign language that no one can understand, a puzzle piece standing alone. I am independent and strong enough to be happy with myself and not have to have someone there to hold me up.
Lifes a silly little thing, but I love my life and I wouldn't trade it for the world. <3
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I like the not being single idea. And I completely agree with being independent and strong enough to be happy with yourself and not having to have someone there by your side. You have amazing friends who will always be there.
ReplyDeleteAnd always remember, sometimes you have to stand alone to prove that you can still stand. <3
I love you Brookey.